Discover This… You Suck

I’ve had credit cards now since I was in my late teens. My first “credit application” was when I was 13 when I bought my first stereo system. Of course I had to have my mom cosign for me but I was able to pay for it. Of course now that I think back, how the fuck did I when I was too young to have a job? Weird. Anyway, the point is that I have been involved in the credit world for a long time up to my ultimate credit of a house, aka legalized loan sharking. There is nothing I enjoy more than purchasing something worth x amount and then over the next 30 years paying back damn near double that amount. Where is my winning lottery ticket, I hate interest unless I’m earning it.

This brings me to my least favorite credit card… Discover. Why are they so damn pesty? My card doesn’t expire for like 5 years, but it seems they send me a replacement card every year. Do you think I am wearing it out? I don’t even use it. The only reason I would carry my Discover card is if it was icy and I forgot my scraper for my car windows. That, or if I wanted to break into a door that doesn’t have a deadbolt on it; other that those reasons, that card is totally worthless. Now I just got my new card in the mail again (my original was good through 2013, just like the replacement they sent me) so I had to call and activate it. When I call to activate I’m put through to the live person instead of being able to just activate by pushing buttons like normal cards do. I get on the phone with this woman and she’s asking me why I haven’t used my card since 2008. I said well I normally just use my debit card or cash. Then she goes into this big ordeal how if I carry cash it could be stolen but I’d be safe with using my Discover card. Well no shit Sherlock, nobody wants to steal that shit. If someone stole a wallet and it had a Discover card and a 10 year old condom in it, they’d be ecstatic about the vintage Trojan they found. After this she had the audacity to ask me if I would promise to use my Discover card more. Look, if you’re not happy that I’m not using my card, then grow some balls like those assholes over at MasterCard and cancel my damn accounts for inactivity. I have a house now; I don’t use anything but my Menards card and my debit card. I use one because I’m always buying something for the house and the other because I’d rather spend money I have, not money I can pay back.

In other news, it snowed here Friday and Saturday. Let me repeat that in case it didn’t sink in… it snowed here. Need I remind you that in April I actually was able to leave my windows open overnight a couple times, then in May I’m dodging pelting snow and 30mph winds… that is fucked up, and unfortunately normal in Wisconsin. On the plus side we are up to a balmy 48 degrees here and heading for a high of 57. You know what that means right? No winter coat today!